A Little Thing Called Love

yyaaaaayyy..... I'm baaaacckk.... *punch* :D

anyway I'm in a really good mood to write ... because I just cried, sounds strange, eh?

Yup... I just cried because this silly stupid funny movie...

maybe you wondering why I cried when I watched a funny movie...

because the story was so touching and was soooo me... it's seems my story at the past... 

I'm not gonna review this movie, you can find it in google-he knows everything- or you can read here

what I'm gonna tell you is about how that crazy little thing that we usually called love can change us, turn us from zero to hero, make us become something from nothing or make an ugly dug become a pretty swan...

how could be?

did we really know what love it is?

have we meet it before?

how could we know it's a love while we never know how it's shape? circle? square? elipse? did we know it?

no... we didnt, and we never ever could meet it... it's absurd, untouching, silly, but as most as we deny it, we know more that we need it...

okay... let me tell you some spoiler about this movie...

it's a klise topic actually,  an ugly girl who fall in love to her senior and keep that feeling without tell him even actually they have a same feeling, and the girl, Nam, was tried too hard to attract his attention, starting to do some weirdo love methods, dress up her self into a pretty girl and time by time she, from an ugly duck became a very pretty swan, and everyman adore him, but there is only one man who keep staying in her heart, yeah... her senior who never be brave to tell Nam that he has a same fell because his bestfriend like Nam too, and as their promise-a promise between boys-they couldnt be in love with a same girl... anyway, that's not my point, what I wanna tell here is about how long we've to wait until we meet our Mr/Ms. Right? one week? one month? one year? ten years?

in that movie, in graduate, Nam told Chon, that boy who she in love with, that she love him, she has turn to be a swan just for him, bun how unlucky she is, Chon already make a relationship with Pin,his classmate, one week ago... yeah... she was late..

maybe we have heard that If we love someone, tell him/her as soon as possible, before too late or somebody do it before you...

but sometimes we dont have a strong heart to say it, we just scare about the rejection, we just scare about our heart to be hurt, yeah.. we just scare that our love will never been replied... we just too scared...

and after 9 years, when Nam back to Thailand, she was studied fashion in America, and became so famous now, in a talk show, finally the time meet them, their destiny has been put in same time in a same  place, yeah... after 9 years, which is mean Nam have been in love to Chon for almost 12 years... can you imagine that? your brain, your heart, is only for one person, that you always waiting for, 12 years is not a short time... it's a very long time to keep that feeling to be faithful... and as a mostly romantic movie did, it's a happy ending story, when the prince got his princess...

Nam was an ugly duck

then transformed into a pretty girl

finally, she is a SWAN

but c'mon... we didnt live in a fairy tale world, we live in a realistic one, we dont have waste our time for waiting someone who couldnt be guarantee that she/he will be our long last love forever...

yeah... we did live in a kind of world like that... but is it wrong when we dream to be a princess in this life? not,,, it wasnt wrong... the only thing that wrong is when we just became so addicted to that person and we might never know that maybe there is someone else who waiting for us, that maybe we just not into him/her, that maybe she/he just not into us, that maybe we got a wrong feeling, that maybe, maybe,maybe and many more... so why we should lose another chance to get a better love and sacrificing our feeling for something that we didnt sure yet?

hahahaha,,,, how clever I talk... it sounds like I never do that stupid silly things before...

I did it... yeah... I have been waiting for almost 7 years just for the boy that I just talked with him once, can you believe that?

oh not once, but twice if when she ordered me to swept the floor in my class in count...

that was the first time he talked to me, as my seniors, he asked me to swept those floor but I reject it, not because I dont wanna do it, but I suddenly act so silly and lose control and I even didnt think what I said... *sigh*

and the second one in front of library, he called me and ask me "are you pratiwi hamdhana?, and for your information, I didnt use my shoes at that time, I even didnt use a slipper because I just back from pray-even I didnt really like use shoes in any condition-then, I answered "yes", he said next "okay, you might go" 

THAT'S IT!!!!

after that,no more conversation, no more chat, no more... but I more adore him, I adore how smart he is, I adore how charismatic he is... until he graduate and continue his study in one of favorite HSH in my town and silly me, the only reason why I want to continue my SHS in the same school with him not because it's a fav school, but there is HIM...   so silly, eh? yeaah... 

but God know me better, I didnt pass it...

time by time, I keep in search information about him, and he graduate his SHS faster because he smart, he just need 2 years to pas his SHS, and then he continue to collage not in Indonesia, but in Malaysia...

I just knew it when in 3rd grade in SHS, and finally I decided, I'll looking for him, try to find some information, but I make a deal with my self, when that time I couldnt find him, I'll erase him and continue my life without anythings about him, but once again, God know me better... it's a very easy to know where he is, where he study, I even got his YM and his mobile number... then we were friend in YM and facebook then... he has a girlfriend at that time -and now he has a fiancée- 

in a short story after collect my bravery I decided to told him that I've been adore him for almost 7 years... I couldnt say that I'm in love with him because I never know what love it is, so let just we say it a crush... 

I told him by email, I still remembered that time, I sent that email from internet cafe, 10-15 minutes from my home, at 10 PM, after sent it, I walked go home, really walked, and regret what I just did, how I could be so silly stupid girl...but It happened and at the morning I got his reply...

he told me that why I just told him? why I didnt told him when we still in Junior High School... it was too late now, because he has a girlfriend-I knew that, I even be his GF's friend in facebook-then after that I never reply that email again...

I thought I'll forget him, but it wasnt as easy as I know.. but dont worry time is a very good medicine for those who has heart break ill-or let we say something like that-

Now, I'm fine, even sometimes still think about him who already have a fiancée there...

yeah, I'm okay... 

I just wanna thanks to him who already gave another color in my life...

thank you for your unawareness fill in my mind at that time,

thank you for your passiveness to me who always seeking on you,

thank you for keep in faithful to fill page by page in my life's book,

thank you to allow me adore you even I did it in silence,

thank you because of you I braved to speak up,

thanks for you, my past man...

anyway, we are friend now, not too close, just a friend in YM and facebook, and did some chat about something...

and as you know, even maybe he know me earlier and lucky me he has a same feeling-in case-I still couldnt make any relationship to him bacause I've promised to my self, to my God, to my faith, that I wont make any closer relation to any man until someone propose me to marry him... *it sounds so weird in this era now, but that's my faith and I'll always to keep it in right way...

so, for you who have been waiting for someone or who have been so scared to tell someone how much you love him/her, I recommend you to watch this movie...

*big hugs*

Tiwi 

my random facts #1

yeaaah... long time no see my blog....

It's kinda busy for me this months, a lot of deadline, my new project is starting now and I have to handle it, and some trouble to manage which are one of them is my lazy habit... Oopsss...

actually I dont know what to write, anyway I just did a movie marathon tonite, alone in my home because my families went to my family's wedding in Sorowako, as you know it's 10 hours far from here, so yaaa... it's faaarrrr faaar away... :D

Oh ya, I watched easyA and the old one (not really old actually) If Only, the 1st movie completely made me laugh and teach me something about helping people with lying which is only bring you to big trouble, and at the end you should be responsible on it, and the 2nd one, completely made me drop down my tears in the end.... someone had told me when I update my status on facebook that I'm watching If Only, to be careful of cry, and at the beginning and in the middle, it just kinda usual romantic movie, but at the climax, it's successful made me cried... an unfair ending, thy should be together, not separated by death...

for those who never watch it, I suggest you to do it immediately....

anyway... here we go...

tadaaa.... I present you some random facts about me, which is maybe you dont have any interest to read it, hehhee

1. I use my wristwatch on the right, not on the left one which is a lot of people usually did it, I dont know why, but I just felt comfy when I put it on the right... 
2. I got one new habit, I forgot when it started, but for now when I go to toilet and take a p*p, I always bring a book, something to read, and I can spent extra time in that not to finish my human activity (re: p*p), but to finish one chapter of that book I read... 
3. I'm a delay person, especially in wake up moment, I just always wanna make it click with the time which is I mean here is in case I wake up at 6:26 AM, then I'll delay it until 6:30 but the facts is I always delay it until 3 times, so it'll be around 7:00 or 7:30, whenever it is, it must click-the minutes- I dunno why but just feel right when you wake up at the 'click' time.
4. Insomnia is my middle name-since work as a movie editor when junior high school and always awake in the middle nite to edit video-until now my habit became uncontrolled... noon or nite is just the same to me... I work at noon and still work at nite..
5. Rat haters, yeah... I hate rat,mouse, or whatever you call that dirty creature, and lucky me, I always can feel when it su*ks animal around me even in some meters far... I prefer to take care a lion or a cheetah-I really wanna have a white cheetah as my pet-than a rat. Rat is the only one animal who can make me cry and jump up to my table and sleep on there, damn!
6. Movie addict - that's why I wanna be a movie director, even my dad didnt allow me to continue my study in IKJ-Intitut Kesenian Jakarta (Jakarta Art Institue)-but anyway I already made my own movie with my friends in SHS, and the title is "Di Antara Kita", I'm a director, a half script writer, and at the last grade in SHS, I became a director of our last art project which is a drama musical, the title is "Anumarta dan Alika", a Romeo and Juliet in traditional version
7. Independent - sometimes I just felt "Am I too independent so sometimes people around me didn't offering me some help?", but yeah... I usually do all my things alone, that's my fault to make my self always think that I should do something or finishing sometime by myself and didn't trust someone to take care about it, yeah... My trust to people is less, but now I'm trying to make it bigger :D
8. Easy to got a crush, believe it or not, actually it's a little bit personal, but I already decided to share about my facts, so here we go... I'm a very loyal person, if I like someone then I'll like him until unpredictable time, but I'm too easy to get a crush on someone, even I never see him before-based on my past actually,ooppss- :D, I can got a crush with someone who can balancing me in chat, who smarter than me, who have a humor sense lot than me, and the silly one who can beat me in any debates...
9. I'm -of course- a day dreamer... my wish lists became longer and longer, I'm dreaming, find a way to make it true and bring it to the reality... some years ago, I've dream to go abroad until I know one BIG news that someone who I looking for about 7 years were living in another country, then I decided to take a big step, yapp... I saved my money to go there, until I know a backpacker world, so, I wanna thanks to this man, because of him-my silly reason to go abroad-finally I'm in love with my new world as a traveller or you can say a backpacker, *sigh* anyway, I never meet this man, in my 1st trip, my 2nd, and next on August 2011, I dunno will I meet him or not... I'll tell my story about this in another post... 
10. I really love to find money, everything I do to get it-in Halal way of course- for me, money is not everything but everything need money, so.. big bullshit for them who said didnt need money or money is unimportant things.. with money we cant buy a love but we can make our love more precious, with money we cant buy a soul but we can make our body health, with money we cant buy a happiness but we can make ourself happy to buy things what we love... but UNDERLINE this... I'm not a materialistic girl, I never use somebody else's money, I use mine, and I never exploit someone to give their money... yaa... I'm not the materialistic girl, but I'm the realistic one..

that's all, if I have a silly mood again, I'll post another facts... anyway it's 5:15 AM, and I'm still awake to finish all my duty - layout wedding invitation , a yasinan print , a banner layout, etc - and thanks God I already spent a few hours to sleep in this afternoon so I'm still have a bit energy to did this INSOMNIA which is sponsored by all that jobs..

see you on my next post...

anyway, I've a plan to feel a different ramadhan in abroad,

I already have the ticket...

*just share a little surprise, :D

Live is unpredictable

Hi, I AM HAPPY AGAIN, yeaaahh...

you never know how the universe give you some surprise in a same time...
yesterday I told you about my happiest day in this month and alhamdulillah today I did it again...
I wake up lately, and I enjoy it...
and at 10 AM when I am still on a way to wake up, you know is just like you already woke up but you still make a lazy movement on a bed with a half open eyes, my father told me that he will go, all my families went to my uncle's home to make a kind of ceremony to remember my 1000's days since my auntie die...

but  I didn't come, because I already have an appointment with my besties to do a little reunion, so I prepare and go to the MARI, the mall we have make a deal to meet, and I came faster than them so I'm going to bookstore, and Oh My... it's addict me...
I obviously can't hold it...
so, there are some books that I bought....

left to right :
- I didnt lose my heart, I sold it on ebay
- Tuhan, Inilah Proposal Hiduku
- Around the world in 80 dinners
- Balada Ching-Ching

and after waiting for almost one hour... finally they came, there are cheng-cheng, depph, athii, and padlii

so, we are going to XXI to watch TRON ( I already watch it last nite with dad and Indra, but there no more good choice except Narnia which is I have been see it too ), and after watched TRON, depph went to home because she already have another appointment, and because we are so starving, we decided to go to Pizza Hut and have a late lunch there with delight menu of course, wkwkw

 cheng-cheng with me

and the most that I love today is... tadaaa.....

padlii who just came from Hajj bring me a 'gift' - a new iphone charger - finally after a long negotiation it belong to me, wkwkw honestly it's not a free gift, I just ask him to bought it for me, and I will pay for it, but after a long long negotiation... it's mine now for free... thanks a lot brother.....

cheng-cheng, me, athii
( I'm the shortest there, wkwk )

and after eat, padlii went to home and me with athii and cheng are going to Gramedia ( again for me ) and my addicted to stationary is increase... finally I took these stuff...

it's a very cute note..

look at the contents...

I have been obsessed to France, so I will collect all the things about it...

the most I love from my new stuff is my new charger... finally after waiting for some months...

my iphone is going back to the world... after a long hibernation, wkwkw

my iphone with its new charger - good bye the old broken one, I place you in a safety box -
welcome my new pretty charger - I will take care of you -

 here are my new book collections...

and one more surprise, someone from my past just comeback and add me on facebook again ( I'll tell you later the story ) and after a long consideration... I approve him.... :D

Dear, God...

I know You area the Great Creator, You always gave us a lot of surprise and make this universe shock us with the unpredictable life, that's way I love to life, so please make my life and all people in my life to feel it longer, longer and longer.... thanks God... I love You...

anyway, today - December 26th - is cheng-cheng birthday... happy became older my dear... may Allah always bless you and give you the best... amiin....

Happy

Friday, 24th Desember...
one day before x-mas day, happy x- mas for anyone who celebrate it...
anyway I'm a moslem... :D

it was my happiest day in this few weeks, after all the hard things happen, after all the problem starting to annoyed, after all the exam on process to be done... Yeah... it was really really my happiest day in this month...

okay, I have been cancel to join in Toraja Trip, I really wanna it because I never been there before, but I have a lot of job that must be done before end of year, there are a lof of wedding invitation lay out that I have to make, some banners, and many more... yeah... I work overtime this week...

but hey... it's worth it... I got some payment extra, hihihi...

I work from morning till noon around 2 PM, and alhamdulillah it's working good... and then I'm going to do some healing treatment for my self, or maybe for mostly woman did, I'm going to shop, hihihi....

here is some things that I bought...

it's my big choco... yeah... it's brown anyway, not black...

here is... my little brown velvet...

and my most cute, mappie bag...

anyway, that mappie bag... I didn't buy it today, it was from online shop a couple days ago... I really love it, it just like a entire world is mine now... amiin >.<

and the most thing that I love in this lucky bless friday is my WONDERSHOE... finally I got it... actually it's already arrived since some days ago, but the postman couldn't find my adress, so I decided to take it from JNE office tonight, and the most stupid things when I try to find JNE's office, I hold a wrong 'pete-pete'-a kind of public transportation- and finally I have to go far away from my destiny, and the silly one is I even didn't know where is exactly the office, so I just looking around while the 'pete-pete' taking me, and I miss it, I go really far and desperate then decided to go back, after some minutes in going back, I see that office, it's really near from the spot that I switch the 'pete-pete', wkwkw 

the box is so sick... it has been some days... huhuhu

velvet greeeyy... I love velvet and I love grey...

look my funny face with my sweet flat

here is my ballet flat... it's 50.000 IDR-bought in MTC

I love the silver ornament one... and it's a brownie sparkling too...

that shoes I didn't bought it today, it just 2 or 3 days ago... but I just wanna show it off, hehehe

and after took my wondershoe, I'm going home, and my father asked me to movie tonight, TRON LEGACY... with my brother... yeaah....

so, we took the last show at 9.20 PM, and before that we're going to dinner, a hurry dinner actually, because we arrive in mall around 9 and directly bought a ticket and going to a resto and order the fastest menu there, and it was a meatball... 

10 minutes passed, and it's 9.10 when our order came, so we eat so fast, and ran to the theatre to catch the movie, and thanks God we didn't miss it...

and it's a late night when we go home but before that we go to minimarket first to bought some snack and drinks...

and here I am with a lovely ULTRA MILK... 

I LOVE ULTRA MILK

see... when somebody told you that everything will be beautiful at the time... yeah... you should believe it...

thanks God for bring my the happiness today....

thanks God coz give me a continuos smile...

and I hope it'll take a longer, longer than ever...

thanks for make me happy today...

Love You, God...

sometimes we need to lie

I am a liar...

not once, but in many times, many conditions, many ways...

ya... I am a big liar, who doesn't? We all a liar, you, your family, your love, your besties, your enemy, all people in the world is a liar...

sometimes we lie to protect our self, or to hide something, or maybe to protect someone we love, or something we like... we are lying in difference reason, and even we know that's wrong, but we have no choice.... no no no... we have no choice... ya, we always have a choice, we can choose to be honest, no matter the result, but sometimes we too scared to admit it, we scare we'll get anger, we scare we'll loose what we like or love, ya... we, people-human being, are too scare, either the effect to ourself or to somebody else or something else... that's why we lie..

and today, I did it..

I am lying...

I am a big liar...

it was began yesterday, when I have a job to make a wedding invitation which is the date is Januari 8th 2011, but I wrote it 2010... what a damn stupid mistake...

and finally when the operator finished to print it, 1000 invitations, we just recognize, it's a big FALSE... 

so, we make a deal, between me and that operator, it was our secret, then we make a plan... 

we will order new papers, that he will print it in outside, in his old office, than after that, we will switch the wrong one with the new one... 

but you know, lying is never easy to do, trust me...

anyway, the only reason why I choose to hide it from the big boss is I just too scare to get his anger anymore... I'm just too tired to feel that in many times, to feel that pressure, so do the operator...

ya... we just too scare...

and in this sunday, I came to printing office, but unlucky, there is the big boss that I thought before he won't be here... he is repairing something and his car with some man, so quietly I do my plan...

I take that old invitation, and packing it, in silent way of course, and let me told you, It's never easy... then after packing it, damn, he gap me, and ask me what I did? spontaneously, I said I'm packing my friends books to send to her city, and thanks God he looks believe it...

and after all the things already prepared, I text that operator, and ask him to prepare to meet me in the park near that, but damn, one more unlucky, I heard the big boss will eat in front of that park, ggrhh..... trust me this is the God's way to stop me to lie... 

as faster as I can, I call the operator and told him to move to the bridge that a little bit far than the park from office and it's located in opposite side of the park... 

so, when the big boss go to lunch, I am running to get out, but Oh My... the paper was so heavy.. of course, it's 2000 sheet with the envelopes, but I got the lucky things, when I go out I saw the operator with his friend by motorcycle and suddenly ask him to stop and pick up the papers...

and I'm done... Now, it's his turn to do this plan...

I said to the big boss I'll be back after send my friends stuff, but it's too fast, so I'm going to warteg - it's a kind of place that you can eat, some traditional food in street side -

I am eating slowly then go back to office, and around 4 PM, the operator text me that his job already done...

now our task is how to bring the new one on monday tomorrow before the big boss see it...

let me think it later...

now I just wanna enjoy my sunday...

happy sunday all...

sometimes we have to lie,

but be honest is the best...